Prairie

Lambretta Fever

If you were to ask me which one I love better, Johnny Depp or 

this Italian Lambretta - golly gosh - it'd be a difficult choice.

I've never been on a Lambretta and honestly can say the same 

about Johnny.... 

big sigh - staring off into space and drooling on my shirt now.

Both of them are gorgeous - but common sense tells me that I'd

be riding the scooter before I'd ever....drool, slurp, gahhhh....

It's been a fanciful notion for many years now - riding the scooter.

Haven't even told my daughters.  They'd frown on it - just like 

they did when I announced in 2000, that I was getting my 

navel pierced.  They were so tyrannical for a fourteen and 

seventeen year old.  Absolutely no fun those two.

 

This could be me and Johnny on this Lambretta - scooting along

on the Riviera coastline !!  I could ride side saddle like this as this

is how I use to ride horses - Madonna taught me !!  Madge was 

so good riding those horses when she was English. 

 

If you've ever watched the movie - Roman Holiday - starring

Audrey Hepburn, you would see her zipping along the 

streets of Rome on the back of  a Lambretta.  Lucky girl !

 

Even Jayne Mansfield gets to drive one - or shall

we say, pose on it provocatively with one butt cheek 

barely touching the seat and looking very pout(y) and 

pointy. She has excellent posture.  I really love her shoes !!

 

Now this more like it - I look exactly like this woman.

I have dark hair, the cleavage, nice legs, I wear scarves

and I always wear high heels with my shorts.  She doesn't

look like anyone famous - so there's hope for me yet.

 

White or blue ??  

I can never make up my mind so I'll have one of each. 

 

Lovely photo.  This is the one. I'll have the red one please.

My idea of customizing would be a woven basket on the front 

with a baguette, cheese, bottle of wine, flowers and a little

poodle. Just so you know, I wouldn't have the poodle sitting

on the bread or cheese - not very hygienic.

Okay then - sit back, relax with a bowl of popcorn and 

watch this very kitsch, vintage Lambretta advert about 

fifty-five times.  Check out the guys with the cow patterned

suits. Those had better not be real cow suits. 

Sushi

I promised myself when I started Prairie,  I would not be slapping a bunch 

of  YouTube videos on my posts. I apologise, I'm weak and easily influenced 

and quite possibly in need of help. Would anyone know if there's a clinic for

YouTube addicts ?  But gosh, golly, darn it !  It's such a fun place to explore 

and when I find something I like, I have to share it !!  I just have to !!

Could not resist this one, it's extremely satirical - and meant to be literal.  

Biting humour at it's best.  Although it starts off a bit slow - I promise you, 

it will draw you in.

In the mean time.....

Prairie is busy sewing little girly gifts for girlfriends, designing a calendar 

for 2010, all sorts of cards and I'm out walking the fields looking for some 

cows to photograph. Not a cow in site - sad.

I suspect they have all gone on holiday, to the South of France.

I have no other alternative but to follow them to the Riviera and bring

them back to England. I will find them - naughty cows !

They are in big trouble, those busters.

Now watch this and learn - How To Eat Sushi

Tiny Kline

She stands just  4 ft. 10 in. tall and weighs all of 98 pounds and in 1932 this petite Hungarian, Jewish emigrant, crossed Times Square in a most unconventional, maverick manner - flying over the streets of New York by her teeth - like a blooming Tinker Bell !  

I'm pretty sure she doesn't have dentures.  

Tiny Kline; former circus aerialist and burlesque dancer, actually landed the job of the real live Tinker Bell at Disney Land and was performing this stunt 

well into the age of 70.  Tiny's flight was stopped by running her into a wall of mattresses.  She was known for being a bit temperamental.  I can't blame her.

How would you like to be slammed into a wall of mattresses night after night ? 

She retired in 1964 - because of poor health.

The Ring of Light

I got a letter the other day from this lady.

Her name is Angela and she claims she was handed an envelope with a list of people that were experiencing dire circumstances in every aspect of their life; financial and emotional, and that my name was on the list and it was then, during a divination session, that she had a spontaneous vision, something that occurs very rarely....

Whew !  How was that for a run on sentence ?

I'm warning you - this next part is scary !

She saw that there's a shadow zone standing in the way of my happiness at this time and that the atmosphere around me is charged with negativity.  Angela, is very worried about me.

What a sweet woman !!  I'm impressed, as Angela lives a long ways from me - in the Netherlands.  Her powers must be awesome ! 

I was wondering though, is there anyone else out there that knows about this list?  I feel so uniformed right now.

Because she's such a kind and caring woman, she cannot simply sit by and do nothing. She wants to give me help and believe it or not, she does not do this for just any old joe !! Golly gosh - She's already like a Grandmother to me. Where has this woman been all my pitiful life ?!

Wait - there's more !  

The best part was the second envelope.

This is almost as exciting as  "The Da Vinci Code" isn't it ?

Between you and me - I could not get this second envelope opened fast enough. I was gagging to see what was inside.  Surprise ! It was a testimonial letter from this young woman - Julie Preston. A copy of a hand written letter - both sides full - explaining how miserable her life use to be.

Crikey !  I was in tears after reading this letter.  The poor girl has suffered so much.  She felt as if everyone in her life was conspiring against her; neighbours with evil intentions, jealous work colleagues and if that wasn't enough, she was surrounded by negative vibrations that were impregnating her environment - which was being caused by objects in her house. Lordy, lordy that wretched child !

Julie explained in her letter, that for a mere £15 ($22.26) I too, could discover the beneficial power of the "Authentic Ring of Light" that has been kept a mystery until now.  She went on to say, The moment I started wearing the Ring, I began to have a strange sensation....

A strange sensation - eh ?

 

Which leads me to believe they must include some kind of pills with this offer. I mean - look at how she's smiling !!

The "Authentic Ring of Light" - a replica worn by the Pharaohs of ancient Egypt - creates a sphere of protection around the person wearing it, placing them out of reach from any harmful attack. 

Listen to this amazing story....

Soon after she put the ring on, Julie was involved in a serious accident - hit by a truck while driving to work.  The shock was terrible but she managed to get out of her car unhurt. Julie considers this a miracle, since her car was a total loss. 

I wasn't quite convinced about the ring until I read this last bit - The "Authentic Ring of Light" is a powerful weapon, capable of destroying any attempt by the evil eye to do you harm.

And as a bonus - it protects from evil spells.

Why didn't they say this in the first place ?!

It reeled me in.  I just knew I had to order this magical talisman.

But I had to hurry because there are only so many left - yikes !!

Well - I signed those forms faster than you could whistle "Yankee Doodle Dandy" and ran as fast as my little, fat legs could go and posted it straight away via airmail.  Hope it gets there in time.

I know I shouldn't have, but I used my mad money.

or should I say my - barking mad - money.

Angela, you have forever changed  my life.

I am a believer - thank you !

P.S. - please do not forget to send those "sensation pills."

Thanks again,

Marsha